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Sunday, 07 February 2010

  • Breathe - G-Dragon

    Hello :)
    This is for Baby <3

    I hate to see you sad especially when I'm not around~
    So read on and cheer up! :D



    No doubt this weekend seems to be the toughest out of all the weekends,
    but whatever it is I hope you'll stay +ve and cheerful and as bubbly as you have always been :)

    I'm always here for you baby ah~
    Saranghae *copies Seungri's pose*
    Haha, I bet that picture just gives you goosebumps or probably a lot of cotton-candy feeling (mushy).
    I know (KNOW) you like this and hope it'll spur you on for the week :)



    *giggles*
    It makes my heart beat very fast :P
    (Look at those arms, and the label on the undergarment... Need I say more?)
    HAHA, WHY AM I TALKING ABOUT THE LABEL??!!

    --

    I love you!
    Hope this cheers you up~
    It'll be Monday already!
    And we'll be able to see each other again :)

Sunday, 31 January 2010

  • Because of You - After School

    Haha, hello~
    I came here to fill up this space because it seems abandoned :P

    --



    School's been alright lately, just tired after lessons/school.
    It's a norm btw.

    The only thing I cannot stand now a days is the weather.
    It's PMS-ing every now and then, no I don't mean like it starts raining red-bloody-stuff (euw).
    I meant like it'll be so hot one moment and the next thing you know, eh? It's raining!
    I'll be a little happier when it rains cause it'll be cooler, but that joy is temporary cause the rain lasts shorter than my attention span (my attention span is ... very good, right dongsaeng???) :P Yes it is, I should probably change this sentence.

    *Edit*

    I'll be a little happier when it rains cause it'll be cooler, but that joy is temporary cause the rain lasts shorter than the kindergarten kids' attention span. (much better!)

    *End of Edit*

    I wish the weather in Singapore is 15 degree celcius because it'll be cool all the time and my hair and skin wouldn't go so dry all the time, hmph~

    Nonetheless,     school's enjoyable~
    Because of You :)
    *cheers*

    --

    Exams are coming in less than 3 weeks from now, I should probably start revising for real.
    Hello colourful pens! (Baby, I wanna go Daiso to get more pens just in case they run out of ink).
    I'm actually very excited to study, but not excited to throw it all out during exams because exams makes me nervous and restless :(
    Hopefully, I'll pull a better GPA this time round *cheers neurons*~
    Fighting! :D

    I don't have much to say other than start revising :P
    I just wanna get the reports and tutorials done and over with because it's bugging me and stopping me from starting on my rev.
    I'll get it done for sure!

    --

    I know this is late, but you're always welcome baby <3
    Brainy the Baby Bunny has a very good Umma! :D
    Be good ok Brainy?~
    *blows kisses at Brainy*

    Saranghaeyo!

    --

    I find it hard to update now a days because I simply have nothing to update about lol.
    I miss Cell Biology lectures btw because the last lecture was on Thursday~ :'(
    Haiz, I can't wait for exams to be overrrrrr and then holidaysssss will commence and I wanna rest so much till I get tired of resting (if that's ever possible haha) then enjoy my time with my lovable dongsaeng :)

    Exams here I come kick your ass *kungfu move*
    HAHA SEE YA!


Wednesday, 20 January 2010

Tuesday, 19 January 2010

  • Top of The World - Big Bang

    Let's start out happy...
    HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY MINZY~



    Hope you had an awesome day, because I did! :D

    --

    The sad stuff...

    The more I say it,
    the worser I feel.

    So I should stop thinking about things that's not related to school anymore,
    so that I can focus on my upcoming exams~ :)

    Things just don't go the way you want them to be, because it wasn't meant to.

    --

    That aside, now I feel like I just vomitted out my worries and thoughts.
    It was bugging me the entire day, like a parasite.
    Positivity will make me feel better, for sure.

    --

    Things that makes me forget my worries/sadness...

    Yesterday was MD Concert for SP Band!
    It was such a blast I can't stop thinking about it.
    Just being there is already so awesome~
    What more performing there, on stage with the lights and camera and audience watching you, plus it was my first time, so imagine the amount of excitement bubbling in me.

    Thank god, everything went pretty smoothly during the concert.
    Mistakes made shall be kept a secret, so long as the entire concert was nice, it's fine :P
    I love yesterday!

    However, yesterday marked the graduation of the year 3s from SP Band.
    It makes me sad because band has been fun with these bunch of people around.
    I hope they come back.

    Missing them already! :'(
    There are just so many characters that makes life much more colourful know?
    Appreciate every one of them :)

    --

    I even dreamt of yesterday, plus a few other things.
    Haiz, sometimes, my dreams are so good, I wish I could stay in there forever know?
    Don't you get the feeling too? No?

    Dreaming is fine, thinking (too much) isn't.

    --

    I used to go to concerts held at Esplanade and watch bands and orchestras play and wished I could be one of them, and guess what?
    I already had my chance~
    Really thankful :)

    *cheers*

    --

    Thanks to those who came down to support us!
    Like Darrin, Thuzar, my family~
    Appreciate it alot! :D

    Hope they'll come again the next concert~
    I shall do better :)

    And of course, congrats to the band for playing so well yesterday!
    We sounded really good :D

    --

    Shall get back to mugging/assignments.
    Another chapter awaits.
    Aishah, fighting!


Saturday, 09 January 2010

  • AH - After School

    After this, I must remain positive.

    --

    Yes, I do feel like I'm about to burst and cry when school ends all the time with the amount of work and practices that we have, hence the title.



    School has been really exhausting to the point that I couldn't even get out of bed to go for sectionals today, felt so exhausted beyond words and sick too.
    Must recuperate before another round of exhaustion takes place cause guess what...
    There's band practice spam the entire week next week except on Sunday!
    Plus, school starts at 8am every single day T_T
    My eyebags are prominent in a sense that they look like Seungri's :(
    I'm morphing into a panda really soon~
    I really need more sleep than what I'm getting nau.

    My body is breaking apart.

    --

    MST results were an overall disappointment for me.
    I don't know why, probably the amount of time I use/spend with my notes isn't enough to get what I really want.
    I'm trying to use this as something like a really needed form of lesson learnt and turn it into a motivation so that the next time I wouldn't repeat mistakes and suffer the consequences :(

    Well on the positive note, I know where and how I went wrong.
    Just that I need to get over them and move on T_T

    My emotional well being is on the verge of breaking apart too.

    --

    I feel really stupid or silly or whatever you call the feeling is, when I'm around my classmates.
    If they can do this, why can't I?
    I can, I just need more time.

    --

    Anw, school next week will be hell.
    Band, assignments popping out of nowhere, endless lectures, undone tutorials plus tests coming soon.
    One really important test next week, a presentation test, which I'm really nervous about because it's a formal kinda presentation.
    Don't even know what to wear on the day itself T_T

    --

    So many thoughts and things-to-do running through my head,
    its like the morning traffic in NYC in there, and its giving me really bad headaches :(

    Haiz, I think I really need a boost.
    How?

    I'm breaking apart.


Wednesday, 06 January 2010

  • Again & Again - 2PM

    I wish I wasn't born like this.



    It's a volatile period, the first few weeks of school, just because test papers are gonna be returned and I hate the anticipation of receiving them but I hate the feeling of receiving them and looking at how I fair.

    Aishh, I just hate papers.
    Because I can't control my emotions very well.

    Baby ah, I wish my nature wasn't like this.
    I know my very first reaction towards an event will last throughout the day and unfortunately a lot of occassions they weren't very happy emotions.
    Then, you'd have to bear with me for the entire day sulking and crying and throwing childish silent tantrums at you.

    I really don't like to be like this but I don't know why I still do these kinda things :/
    It's confusing for me sometimes but come to think of it, I was always like this since young, that's why I was always afraid to go to school and meet new people.
    Because I was so afraid of failure, disappointment and rejection.
    And on top of that, being horribly depressed once just makes everything a little more worse.
    Because I don't know how to control them.

    I'm sorry baby :'(

    Sometimes I wish I could exchange personalities with someone who is bubbly and always smiling and have the never-say-die-spirit no matter how shitty things appear to be.
    Because I know it hurts to be the one being treated silently and all.

    I'm really sorry :'(

    --

    I seriously think I need to grow up and get a better outlook on life.
    Failure and disappointment doesn't mean the end of the everything, it should be a means of drive for me to do better the next time.
    And comparing myself to others is just bringing myself down isn't it? No? Actually I'm not so sure about this one... But so far it hasn't really done me much motivation (well sometimes) other than pure jealousy, anger and sadness because I feel as though I'm always behind the person T_T

    I should channel those bad energy into something good, like a motivation or sth.
    Something easily said than done, but not impossible to be done either, right?

    --

    I feel like I'm 5 all the time everytime things don't turn out like how I want them to be.

    --

    Baby ah, you're the one who keeps me from being 5 most of the time.
    I wouldn't know how to control my emotions if you weren't there (I know I'm doing a poor job at this).
    I did try my very best not to sulk about it the entire day today, I really did it's just that it wasn't enough was it? I even made you cry I seriously felt like slapping myself really hard.

    Just so you know, I don't mean to be sad or to be easily sadden by things that happen around me.
    I don't wish to have this personality either, really. I wish I was born with a bubbly personality. I looked through my personality test that we took last sem during GEMs and the first thing that came to my mind was that I am not the best person or any type of person anyone wants to be with because of my poor personality :/

    I can't question God's decision to make me this way, all silent and sensitive and shy and an introvert, and that God made it such that you have to be with me, but at least I know why, I hope you do too.

    Mianhe baby ah~

    Just so you know, you being there for me when I was down refrains me from doing things on impulse (I'm not sure if you understand the meaning of impulse actions??).
    Well, it's a good thing for sure.
    Or else I wouldn't be here.

    I love you baby ah~

    --

    On a happier note at least I didn't fail.
    I just wanted the extra boost that didn't happen that's why I was disappointed.
    Plus hearing others whining about their careless mistakes when they already got so much made me feel worse as if I was beyond slow or stupid or sth.
    I really hope they thanked God, at least in their heart, despite what came out from their mouth.

    Sometimes we just can't get enough.
    But that doesn't mean its a bad thing, I mean yes if you look at it, it means that the person is whining because he/she could have done even better, don't get me wrong ok, I do have these moments myself sometimes, well all the time.

    However being around these situations when you're not part of them, well that's another story, isnt' it? No? *shrugs*

    --

    I think without you, I'll be insane.
    Or.. Dead? Okay thats the worse but I'll be 5 forever if I didn't have you.
    Because you take care of me so well.

    Like ensuring I eat, sleep, be healthy and happy. . .

    You keep me sane so you should stay by my side forever, hmm?

    --

    I should finish reading up on Microbio and stop thinking/crying/sulking about today because it's not gonna change anything ok Aishah?
    And I should not skip meals!!!
    Baby, the skipping meals thing is on again I don't know whyyyy~
    I hope it goes away soon! :(

    --

    It's been a long day,
    I love you baby, beyond very much.

Friday, 01 January 2010

  • Last Farewell - Big Bang

    2009 is almost up~
    Aww, it was fun :)

    --
     
    Happy New Year!
    2010, here we come~



    May t    he year bring us good and everlasting friendship,
    never ending love and a closer us! *giggles*

    Of course, a smooth school/life ahead :)
    And good health!

    Saranghae baby

Saturday, 26 December 2009

  • Crazy - Son Dambi

    I'm being driven into insanity.

    Feeling like a bitch.
    I feel like slapping someone in the face.

    No more bloghopping,
    their angsty emotions are being transferred onto me.

    Stupid people and their stupid lives.
    Get a happy one.

    --

    Need to get some control.
    Over this (these) emotionz(s).

    --

    STEWPID SECTIONALS LATER.
    Should have slept eons ago :'(

  • Hello - G-Dragon ft. Sandara Park

    Awful christmas holiday : (
    Spent the entire day either sleeping, teebee-ing or wishing the rain would stop so that I can go for a run (apparently it didn't, so christmas is awful)
    Wanted to go out but I realised there isn't anywhere that I can go and I don't have anyone to go out with anw.
    You can't expect me to go out with my Teddy.
    It'll be so weird. . .

    --

    There's sectionals tomorrow : (
    Boo, I don't wanna go but I don't have a reason for it.
    Sleeping in is not a valid reason is it?

    *Pouts and sulks*

    --

    I think I should learn how to self-entertain.
    Everybody is ignoring me, like I'm not there.



    *SQUEALS*

    Bored as hellz,
    I shall do this for the next few hourz.
    Till I get bored of myselfz.

    --

    I came to tell you how miserable today was,
    because I didn't have you.


Thursday, 24 December 2009

  • Sorry Sorry - Super Junior




    All the questions you've asked me so far have been stuck in my head since forever.
    You don't know how much I've been thinking about them :(

    Yes I do worry what if I can't see you anymore, what if you or I get bored of each other because we hardly see each other, what if this, what if that.

    What ifs.

    But its beyond my control or yours.
    So let's just leave it at what if.

    --

    Feeling like shitz.
    Spiralling.
    Sigh.

    --

    I told you I can't control this emotion.

    --

    I'm sounding more and more gloomy as the entries get by.
    It's all too familiar isn't it?
    and it's all too scary.
    Shoot me in the face.

    Not in the mood for anything at all.

    --

    Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays btw ;)
    Yeap, it'll pass, I'll be okay.

    --

    I just want you, is it that hard?